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PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2007 7:57 pm 
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Hello,



I've spent a long time in Turkey and I'm more or less familiar with the Turkish mentality. But I never expected to face a problem when I tried to arrange my weekend in Istanbul with my Turkish boyfriend. He called different hotels for reservations and he got rejected from all of them simply because he's not married to me. So it's a "shame". It turned out that for the foreigners it's not a shame but for a Turkish citizen it's a shame to spend a night in a hotel with his girlfriend!

I can't believe it is happening in 21st century in a "democratic" country with ambitions to join the EU. It is a fake morality and I'm pissed off from the bottom of my soul.

Guys, can you advise a normal hotel where this issue will not be a problem? I'll appreciate all the suggestions. Thanks!


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2007 9:23 pm 
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I know of lots of Turkish couples that have stayed in hotels here in Istanbul, without any problems. A friend of mine used to stay in the Marmara with his American girlfriend. When my brother got married we all stayed in the Ramada.



I've heard of people having problems in the cheaper hotels in Sultanahmet, but if you go to an ok place you should be fine.







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PostPosted: Wed Apr 11, 2007 9:52 pm 
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Thank you Kelbelle!


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 12, 2007 2:12 am 
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The law in Turkey always demanded that hotels take guests' passport/kimlik details, including of course whether they were married or not. At one time, these details had to be recorded in a register which had to be taken to the jandarma/police on a daily basis. This latter requirement was lifted some years ago.

Unmarried couples weren't permitted to share a room, that was the law. Whether this was ever rescinded I don't honestly know; if what Tallpony is saying is correct, it must have been lifted, and that may be so, but if it is, it's fairly recently.



Even when it was the law, many hotels, particularly in tourist areas, turned a blind eye; but in more conservative areas, such as Konya and the big cities

like Istanbul they did enforce it, because they faced prosecution if they didn't and were caught.



From what you're saying though Nev, it sounds as though perhaps the law still is in force. I'd guess that the big hotels such as Kelbelle is recommending don't face police check-ups, while the smaller & cheaper hotels, particularly around Sultanahmet/Laleli/Aksaray probably do.







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PostPosted: Thu Apr 12, 2007 2:09 pm 
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The hotels we've picked were in Sultanahmet area middle class.
We have never faced this problem at the seaside but couple of years ago we stayed in a hotel in Istanbul - Laleli area where they made our status a problem and blackmailed for more money although at that time my mother was with us and it was obvious that I am not a girl from the street. I think he just wanted to avoid the same thing happen again.
It is better not to give too much information and just show up.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 12, 2007 4:49 pm 
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I just thought that I would add something with regards to what Aggiescat mentioned. Hotels in Turkey still send the kimlik/passport information to the police on a daily basis.



Regards Angie.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 12, 2007 5:26 pm 
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I can remember when most respectable British hotels didn't allowed unmarried couples to share a room, though there were always establishments notorious for " dirty weekends"!

I do know still of lots of hotels in Turkey which certainly do check peoples' marital status, but it's more for the reasons you're saying, to prevent ladies of the night being taken in, which no decent hotel wants to get involved in.

In the tourist areas,the problem's more often caused by foreign women - lady tourists who pick up men in bars or on the street, and try to take them back to their hotel for "a bit of the other". They don't bother to find out (or often just don't care) whether the chap in question is already married, and since adultery still is illegal, this can lead to a lot of bother for the hotel. After all, what hotel wants a reputation as a "knocking shop"?


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PostPosted: Fri Apr 13, 2007 7:58 pm 
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Don't forget that Turkey is still a conservative country but only cheaper hotels ask for the marriage book. Others, like Sheraton, Marriot, Ramada and so on...never ask.

I already travelled to Bodrum, Antalya, Kapadokia and Afyon and they never asked us although I always carry my marriage book with me.


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 12:45 am 
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Two ways that a hotel can still tell if a couple are married though - a Turkish ID card has that information on it, so even if they ask for only the man's documents, they're going to see married or single written there; and of course if the chap's name isn't the same as the woman's, chances are they're not married. Certainly (before anyone says so!) not every woman changes her name, but the vast majority do. Presumably if either of these things are spotted (and if the hotel cares) they would then ask for the woman's documents, or ask outright if the couple are married (and to each other!!)





I've not heard for many years of any hotels on the coast asking whether a couple are married,whether foreign or Turkish, but it's still the norm if one of the couple is Turkish in more conservative areas like Konya. I suspect the only time a hotel on the coast would ask now is if they suspect that the man registering is Turkish, and is indeed married, but not to the lady with whom he is trying to take a hotel room.



And years ago it was the norm to ask marital status in the middle/ cheap price range hotels in the cities, certainly and to my personal knowledge in Istanbul, Ankara, Izmir, Konya, Nevsehir, Adana and Bursa.

I can't speak for the Sheratons and Ramadas, never having been rich enough (or spendthrift enough) to stay at any of them.


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 14, 2007 3:13 pm 
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Question here doesn't seem to be "are they good?", though, but "how do they view a bit of unwed nookie?"



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PostPosted: Wed Apr 25, 2007 9:48 pm 
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Nev ,

We have stayed in hotels zillions of times all around Turkey...It's never been a problem-we always make a reservation on the internet,and a few times I managed to check in without any ID.

As a travel agent I can say that all decent Istanbul hotels have different rates for Turkish citizens, usually 2 times more expensive than those for foreigners.

So if you get a double room on your name.... there will be no problem!

Good luck!


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 Post subject: Re: Hotel for non-married mixed couples
PostPosted: Wed Oct 22, 2008 8:59 pm 
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Cmon guys, r we talking about Turks or all the others. I heard smth about it but I dont think its gonna happen w strangers. Is it_


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 Post subject: Re: Hotel for non-married mixed couples
PostPosted: Thu Oct 23, 2008 6:19 am 
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This is still happening in Turkey..

Me & my boyfriend wanted to go to Bursa for the weekend and he rung 3 hotels and the first thing they asked was if he was married !!!

Many of the hotels in Bodrum / Gumbet do not let Turkish Citizens stay with foregin girls unless they are married..

We did however manage to find a hotel in Bursa which was fab and we had a lovely weekend...

Its not just Turkey it was the same when I was living in Thailand and the guys werent allowed to stay in the same room as foregin girls..


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 Post subject: Re: Hotel for non-married mixed couples
PostPosted: Thu Oct 23, 2008 9:16 pm 
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Whatever, I'm going w my boyfriend to Turkey and this time we r gonna be in a hotel on Sultanahmet. We r both Bosnians, so I hope we r not gonna have any problems, cause we r foreigners. But also, we can be engaged, right? And also, maybe I can be married to him but I didnt take his surname? Oh my God, stil can't believe this is happening.


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 Post subject: Re: Hotel for non-married mixed couples
PostPosted: Fri Nov 14, 2008 9:13 pm 
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I've been non-married to a Turkish man for nearly nine years, and we've run into this problem many times. Points to note:

1. Once you are in for one night, you will have no problems. If a hotel takes you once, they will definitely not throw you out on the second night.
2. The Turkish kimlik describes a single man as single. He is legally required to change his kimlik pretty quickly after a marriage, so claiming "we just got married" won't work.
3. Most hotels do not create trouble. Those that do fall into two categories: hotels run by narrow-minded bigots, and those which are worried about taking in a foreign prostitute and a Turk. I've chatted with many people (including the police) on this, and have heard of no examples of hotel owners who honestly would like to take you in, but think it's illegal.
4. Taksim and Trabzon, in my experience, are the worst places for mixed couples. Lalelei is variable: you should be able to find a place that will take you but you will have to hunt for it on the ground. Sultanahmet is also variable.
5. We've never once had trouble at a seaside hotel where we requested a "dorm bed or maybe a double room... how much do they cost?" Could be coincidence, could be worth trying.
6. We've gone to the police twice when this problem cropped up, and in both cases they told us that a hotel has the right to refuse guests. Fair enough, I guess... it must be hard for the police to "do" anything. It's a bad excuse, but an excuse nevertheless.
7. A few years ago, a wealthy Turkish businessman and his Russian fiance were kicked out of an expensive Taksim hotel. He kicked up an enormous fuss and the issue got quite a bit of publicity. So yes, it does happen (sometimes) at expensive hotels.
8. The last time it happened to us, we'd just biked 70km to the town and were sweaty, tired, and on bikes. I didn't look much like a prostitute! So looking "decent" won't help much.

Blacklist:
The only cheap hotel in Iznik refuses mixed couples.
Most Taksim cheaper hotels refuse us.

Can anyone else add to this blacklist?


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